It’s amazing to look back at my journey to overcoming Binge-Eating Disorder and see how far I’ve come. As I’ve said before, I’m certainly not totally recovered…and it seems that I will always have this knee-jerk reaction to stuff my face with food in response to heightened emotion of any sort. However, I have definitely made some peace with food in the past five years. First of all, I’m able to eat many of the foods that were once on my “forbidden food list”. I did that by slowly reincorporating small portions of those foods into my diet. This was something I learned in Dr. Christopher G. Fairburn’s book, “Overcoming Binge Eating”. Secondly, I’m now able to eat meals spontaneously or change my meal plan mid-day based on circumstances.
For example, today I had planned to eat my leftover Thai fried rice for lunch after a workout at the gym. But when the workout was over, I suddenly felt like going to the orchard/farmer’s market nearby. My boyfriend and I bought corn, tomatoes, peaches, veggie chips, and peanut-butter filled pretzels (the pretzels were my idea). The peaches were so juicy ripe they begged to be eaten at the picnic table under the shade of a giant oak tree with the orchard in sight. As we sat there, slurping up our peaches, the wind blew sticky peach juice onto our hands, arms, faces, and legs. Soon, we were sticking to everything, laughing and cracking open the pretzels and having an impromptu picnic. Gone were my plans to eat fried rice in my air-conditioned dining room. And you know what? Years ago that change in plans would NOT have been okay. I would have been “freaking out” about not sticking with my plan. Today, it just felt right. It was what my mind, body, and spirit needed. I was living “in the moment”.
I wish there was a magic wand I could wave to make everyone feel at peace with food. Heck, I wish I could feel at peace with food every time I ate. But just knowing that peace is mine to be had when I listen to what my mind, body and spirit need, makes this journey a little easier.
Peace with food, joy, and health!